Still Silence.

And she still stood there in silence. In frustration. Frustrated with her own self.

She has ruined one friendship with an amazing guy.

And now, she’s waiting for time to heal him.

And, she is so sorry for the thing that happened.

Things tend to go out of hand and we weren’t there to control it. But, we’re more driven by it.

If what he needs is time, then she’s willing to wait. Doesn’t matter how many seconds,minutes,hours,days,weeks,months or years. Because she has caused him pain. And time will be the punishment for her.

 

Somewhere.

She looked at him in a distance. She could tell he wasn’t paying any attention to the guy in front. His left hand was playing his hair. His right hand gripped the pencil. But his paper remain empty. But he was staring at the paper. Staring it hard. But she knows his gaze is empty.

Somewhere. His mind is at somewhere. And she prayed she could go to wherever his mind is at.

Her mind started to work. What does he thinking about? Is it about a girl?

A girl.

The girl.

The girl that she couldn’t be.

And with that, with a big lump on her chest. She decided to move forward.

“Pass My Shotgun” – Alia.

I hate this time of month where everything seems so wrong.

I hate this time of month where I feel like yelling.

I hate this time of month where I have the urge to punch someone.

I hate this time of month where one person mess with me, I’d go bitch-zilla to him.

I hate this time of month where I’m supposed to be happy but I’m not.

I hate this time of month where everything doesn’t matter to me.

I hate this time of month where I just hate seeing someone but I have to.

I hate this time of month where I have to play nice.

I hate this time of month where I don’t do any sports.

I just hate this time of month.

Turqoise.

“The difference between family and friends is you can’t choose your family, but you can choose your friends”.

This quote is from random celebrity that I read in Reader’s Digest.

As I recall back all my friends, there is one thing that we all have in common : The sense of humor.

A friend that I can really say that has the same humor as me is, Asiemah. She’s my sexy. I love her soo much that it hurts when I have to leave Brunei. I remember crying in the airport when I was leaving to KTJ. She wasn’t there. I cried for that. Though there were other friends of mine, but I was so so sad that she couldn’t make it. She and I could talk for hours and won’t bore each other. I still remember how we first had our talk. I didn’t come to school for the first 2 weeks cause I followed daddy back to Johor. Basically, I don’t know anyone. It was during recess I think, or when the teacher wasn’t in the class that I went to her table and talked about TRL. She said, she watched TRL. I was like, MY OTHER SISTER!! Woohoo!! And we have soo many in common that really started to bond us. Though me and her rarely chat online, but I really do miss her.

While I was in KTJ, I met this awesome girl. We weren’t close from the start. But that certain incident changed it. Slowly we learn each other’s personalities and likes/dislikes. That kind of stuff. We’ve started to hang out more. We’ve realized that though we are completely opposite but we’re so close that it creeps us. It’s amazing how we do keep in touch though we both said that we won’t since we will be in different colleges and different circles of friends. And that’s my Biawak lover, Aiza. :)

While I was in primary school, the girl who totally rocked my primary years was, AMALINA. Gosh, I miss her so much. It’s been ages that we saw each other (almost 6 YEARS!!). She was the first friend that I considered as ‘Best Friend’. We pretty much do everything together. From going to the toilet, to help carrying books for the teacher and even going to the canteen!!. She always help me buy stuff since I’m butt lazy to queue. Hehe.. But she was extremely kind and helpful enough to do it for me. I love her for everything that she did for me. The good, the bad, the ugly, the fights, the tears, the laughter we shared were good. And I’m a bad friend if I ever forget those things.

These 3 girls are a pain the butt, extremely annoying, boring, frustrating, depressed BUT that what makes me LOVE THEM TO DEATH !!!!

So, Asiemah,Aiza, Amalina. I love you guys so so much! Three of you have gorgeous souls that I really wish I have. Thank you for being soo patient with me throughout our friendship.

Ps : You guys are soo not a pain in the butt and all. It’s a completely opposite of that. =)

Sick.

I hate being sick on exam day i.e, today. I had to do maths while I sneezed and sniffed and blew my mucus off. =[

I can multi task but not when I’m sick.

My mind was blank when I set my eyes on the first question.

Now, I can barely remember what I answered.

Oh well, being sick on exam day is not good..!

Till then,

I’m worried.

about a friend of mine.

she trusts the opposite gender easily.

I don’t know if she’s having a culture shock or she just like the attention. But, honestly, you shouldn’t trust the XY chromosomes. *I ain’t hating. But it’s the truth*

I mean, there are 1001 ways the guys can manipulate/use us. Besides, guys and girls can’t really be best friends. Unless one of them are gays. There will always be the word : S.E.X. in between.

I personally do not trust the XY species. Only some of them which I know for years. ONLY. I found it very hard to trust them though I’m super close with them. It also goes the same with the XX species. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. But hey, look where it has gotten me! :D

Anyway, back to this case :

I don’t know if her friends are very generous, but she gets all the treats that she wants. I’m not jealous cause I can afford to pay my own stuff. But don’t you smell the fishyness here ? Like, okay.. You just met this dude for like what ? Few days or months and the next thing you know, he’s treating you this and that. I don’t know. Maybe you’re a great friend that makes he wants to treat you. and hey, I get it, friends treat other friends. But, I don’t know.  I’m a bit skeptical in this matter. =|

You may think that my guy friends don’t treat me. But, I do get treated. I like being pampered. But then, I don’t ask for it.

The thing about her is that, she’s super brave. To get in the car with some random dude she met online and let him take her wherever he wants. Dude, that’s scary! Especially when you’re not a local in this area.

I don’t know. Some of you might agree with me, some of you might against it. But, then.. I’m just worried sick of her. She’s small, fragile and a truly a diamond. I just don’t want anything bad happen for her though she told me for a trillion times that she’ll be fine. But, you might never know.

Till then,

 

Hibernates.

I’m feeling super duper sleepy though I slept for like 9 hours. =s

I woke up at 1pm for Maths.

But I was super buzzed when I got to see the toight buns. ;D

It was directly at me. That magnificent creation was directly in front of me. It was perfect! Hehehehe!!

I need the strength to be strong to face the owner of the magnificent creation.

Ps : I miss the days when I could just sleep the whole day without any distractions.

Been longing to post this one

I LOVE this band.

F.U.C.K.

FUCK

FUCK

FUCK

FUCK

FUCKETY FUCK FUCK.

Blame the hormones? I don’t know and I don’t give a FUCK.

URGH !!!!

I just have this urge to scream on top of my lungs.

FUCK!

Jeans.

Dear Mister Anonymous,

Please, turn around and walk in them sexy toight jeans.

I’m not naughty, Just that it’s just there.

Can’t do much about it but just to, stop & stare.

:)

Curiosity kills a cat.

I just want to slit the person’s throat. He tried to make a prank call to me, but guess what ? He’s messing with a wrong girl here. I don’t trash talk about him. But I just go with his flow.. in a sarcastic way that is. I’m very sarcastic. I can be if you make me to.

Anywho, back to this ‘dude’. I think he’s a guy in my college. Probably same course as mine. And MOST PROLLY a guy in abc. I don’t know. I just have this gut feeling saying that he’s from abc. But you never know right?

I asked Haza, Caim and Sadiq. Apparently, they don’t know anyone with that kind of creepy number.

Haihz. It’s the 1st week after mid break and there’s a drama in day one. Great. I wonder what more this sem has got for me.

BTW,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO

AUDI AZHAR!!!!

*The guy with the brightest smile*

<3

Avatar

Watched Avatar with Nani and Rad @ OU. We took the 11.30am show. I thought it’d be like this boring movie. But boy, I was wrong. DEAD wrong.

The movie is the coolest and most expensive movie made. it’ll be a box office. The plot, storyline and all are just awesome.

The movie takes about 2-3 hours. But trust me, you won’t feel it.

I wanna watch Avatar again. This time, with 3D. :)

 

To : Birthday Boy

Dear Andrie Ung Han Xiang,

When I first met you in form 4. You were such a bad ass to me. You annoyed me like hell. Literally like hell, I tell you. You always ‘FUCK YOU’ and I'll be like, ‘Fine..fuck me now,’ But you never did. =p

And I hated you for that. For annoyed me when I first came to KTJ.

But then, things started to change between us when it’s our final year in KTJ. *Form5*. I started to think, it’s my final year and I don’t wanna make a bad history for it. So, I think I should be nice and friendly to you. We had a ‘heart-to-heart’ convo. well, through sms but still consider right?? And, we finally managed to forget the past and move on. :)

Andrie, you look like a total bad ass. But deep down, I know you’re a total cute cuddly teddy bear. You showed me the whole side of you when you have that SAI problem thingy. And I was shocked to see that and glad too :)

Popo Andrie, Finally you’re legal. Yay you!!

Enjoy your day and I wish you the best of luck in whatever you’re doing now and in the future.

Ps : You still owe me that mini cooper ride. ;p

The Baby Steps.

Slowly, I don’t have that feelings towards you anymore.

Oh boy, I’m glad  =)

I hate it when people start commenting on my weight. Like, what the fuck is your problem? It’s my fucking weight and who are you to have the right to say those such things to me ? You think I like it ? I wonder how do you feel when someone says you’re super skinny or anorexic or a pole ? Does it make you feel happy ? Unless being a pole is one of your aim in life which I highly doubt it.

So yes, stop commenting on peoples’ weight. You’re not only angered that person but also lowered down their self esteems.

Stop thinking that you’re so perfect that you think you can call other peoples’ names. I bet there are some flaws that you have but does people list it down for you? I guess not.

FAGGOTS

‘2 Little Lady

Running under the rain through the midst of the heart of Kuala Lumpur. Spotted one little lady wearing a black shawl, jeans and grey top with another little lady with a shoulder length hair, yellow top, sneakers and jeans ran along from BB to Pavilion. What do they cover themselves with ? Plastic beg. Just to cover their heads, but not their body.’

Yesterday has definitely be one of those crazy moments for Afifah and Ruzanna. We were being our usual crazy,wacko selves. Didn’t care less of what people think as long as we enjoyed our magnifawesome time :D

We watched ‘ZOMBIELAND’. I think we are the two crazy girls that laugh our butts off the most. That movie is the shit..! funnayh as hell. There was this one guy sat in front of us. But then, he moved. Zaza’s work! hahaha! So, once the guy left, we put our feet on the chairs. Comfy!!

We went to BB. Bought dress. Zaza never entered there. Can you imagine that!? Tsk Tsk Tsk..

Anywhooooo… Thank god we bought dress cause due to the ‘rain incident’,I changed to my dress. Who wears dress + sneakers?? That was a terrible fashion style and I swear, I would’ve killed myself as long as I didn’t get caught by the fashion police. LOL.

I think I’m gonna buy more stuff kat BB. BB wait for me!! :p

 

14/12/09 – 2 Little Lady caught running under the rain :)

Dear AS,

I don’t know whether that’s just you. Or you just don’t like me have my own circle. But please, do you really have to be AS-ish by adding all of my friends?

Can I just please, have my own life that doesn’t involves you ?

I honestly do love you as a friend. But you don’t need to be IN ALL of my circles. I don’t even care about your circles. Do I even bother to ask and know ALL of your friends? Urmm.. I don’t think so.

So yes, would you please stop your act ? Cause slowly you’re kinda pissing me off.

The Phase

of ‘screamo,metal core, etc’ is *not so officially* over.

Right now, I’m not into those such genre anymore. I do listen. But I don’t enjoy it as much as I used to. I don’t know. Maybe cause there are bunch of posers out there who act like they really ‘love’ those songs. I just don’t want to be categorized into one. And I don’t brag about it. Like, who cares if you like ‘screamo’ and go to such gigs. I mean, CHILL OUT..! I don’t care. You don’t need to be such a show off and brag it to me. Cause I get it, You like it. Ok fineee.. get a grip about it. Geez..~

 

Zero

Last 2 nights, I watched RUSSEL PETERS : RED,WHITE,BROWN.

That guy is funny as hell !!

Btw, I can’t wait to touch,smell,feel my bag that Sarah bought for me @ Buttons!! :D

Mixture of old and new

Imma make a list of songs that’s really been bursting in my winamp.

1. BEP – Alive
2. BEP – Missing you
3. David Guetta – Memories
4. David Guetta – Toyfriend
5. David Guetta – On the Dance Floor
6. Jeremih – Birthday Sex
7. Parachute – She is Love
8. Parachute – The Mess I Made
9. Michelle Branch – Everywhere
10. Michael Buble – Haven’t Met You Yet
11. The Cab – That ‘70s song
12. Coldplay – Strawberry Swing
13. Dashboard Confessional – Stolen
14. Dashboard Confessional – Belle of the Boulevard
15. Lifehouse – Halfway Gone
16. Lady Gaga – Bad Romance
17. Lady Gaga – No Way
18. Lou Bega – Mambo No.5
19. Taylor Swift – Crazier
20. Paolo Nutini – Rewind

There’s a lot more but I’m super lazy to list all.

I can make believe I have everything

But I can’t pretend that I don’t see

That without you girl my life is incomplete

- Sisqo , Incomplete

The Leopard and the Hyena.

Met up Dique @ Starbucks with Haza.

That guy is full of fairytales.

He really has good laugh having fun of me.

Oh well..

Anywho, tomorrow’s Arab. I really have to hit the book!!

Wish me the best of luck.

Ps : Mazni, Sadique said you look matured. Which means, I look like the YOUNGEST among the 4 Noahs

See, being short does help.

1.30am

And I still can’t sleep.

I have chem lab at 8. I just hope it’s cancel because the rest of the class have EXAM. I wish them the best of luck :)

Anywhoo… I’m terrified of going back to sleep. Just incase, I dreamt of ‘it’ again. It really scares the hell out of me. Sadiq shouldn’t say ‘sex appeal’. Look where it has got me!?

My heart was racing when I saw it. Garghh! euwyy..! Why!!? If it’s someone else beside it. I really don’t mind. But it’s IT.

It’s the second dream I have that involves IT

–___-

Skies. Bright Lights.

I can’t believe maths has been postponed to 27TH DEC. Which means I can’t go to ROCK THE WORLD 9.

What the fuckety fuck!?

I have been waiting for it and then BOOM! Fah K told me maths is on 27th.

I AM NOT HAPPY WITH IT!

Pros : I have 3 extra days to polish up my maths.

Cons : IT’S ON FREAKING SUNDAY.

I HAVE TO CANCEL ROTW.

=(

For all the times.

Maths quiz has been postponed  :)

I don’t know why, but lately I kinda have this mood swing thingy. Like, 1 sec I’ll be fine the next thing you know the bitch inside me is roaring to get out. *Exaggerate much*

Whenever the bitch mode is on I feel like I NEED to punch someone. Anyone wanna volunteer? I’ll you a HUGE favor for that =)

I just feel. URGH ARGH GARGH GRR.

but the thing is, WHY NOW?

Wonderful World.

I have to stop cracking my fingers. It’s a bad habit. I’m scared that I will have Arthritis. *Nauzubillah*

Anywho, somehow. I miss my parents.

Sir Faisal really reminds me of ayah. Maybe because :

1. He’s a computer lecturer.

2. He has that ‘IT sense of humor’

Sorry ayah, you’re a cool person. But, I think when you teach, it’s a totally different side of Noah that I’ll see. haha!

But I STILL L.O.V.E. you my ayah! :)

I can’t wait for January.